Harry Potter and the Unusual Day
by WritingJunkie
Summary: An unusual day at Hogwarts. Response to a challenge made by KirstyT23. Random Phrases Challenge Response.


Many of the characters are not in character but that is the way I meant it to be written.

Harry Potter and the Unusual Day

Severus had been sitting in his office at Hogwarts all day and he was thinking about his past, 1974 to be precise, and he had been having flashbacks about it all day.

_He had been working hard on his Potions work all day when Potter and his friends had arrived. Lupin picked up Snape's potions work and put it in the fire, watching it burn. Potter was laughing hysterically at him. "Serves you right Snivellus!" Potter said, "You shouldn't have told McGonagall it was us!"_

_They were all laughing hysterically at Snape as he glared at them all "I'll get you Potter. And your little dog too," Severus snarled before walking out of the library and down the stairs to the Great Hall. That evening he slipped some polyjuice potion into James Potter's drink and waited for him to take a sip. A few seconds later, the entire hall was laughing at him. "Why are they laughing?" he asked Sirius._

"_You just turned into a llama!" Sirius replied, in between wiping away tears of laughter._

_"What? I'm a llama?"_ _James asked furiously, but even though he was furious about it, his friends were all laughing at him. He stormed out of the hall looking so angry Severus almost felt sorry for him. __Almost_

He was brought back to the present by some sort of argument going on outside his office so he decided he should probably do something about it, especially if it meant some points could be removed from Gryffindor. He opened the door and shouted "It's a bird, it's a plane, no it's Harry!" pointing at him like he was a creature from the zoo. "What is this rumpus!?" at Harry and Ron once he had gotten over the fact that Harry was there.

"It's called a fight," Ron explained, rolling his eyes as he aimed a flipendo knockback jinx at Draco Malfoy. "You have to attack your enemies and try to win you see!"

Snape rolled his eyes and shouted "Stop! Why can't we all just be friends?"

The entire fight stopped and everyone stared at Snape as if he was some sort of lunatic. George was so astounded he said "You're such a silly goose!"

Snape looked astonished at what George had just said and he turned to the other teachers for support, but all Dumbledore could say was "The ship, it's sinking!" which Snape took to mean that the whole school was falling apart. He sighed, looking around at the students who were all fighting again except Harry. Hermione and Draco had continued to fight verbally through the whole thing with Snape.

Draco glared at Hermione and said, "Surrender now, or prepare to fight!"

To which Ron replied "Someone needs a hug." He then hugged Draco lovingly, the way couples would hug.

"That's Fantabulous!" Draco replied as he hugged Ron back. McGonagall burst out laughing at the strange word that had just come from Draco's mouth and Snape gave her a very strange look.

Hermione's jaw dropped in surprise at her boyfriend's action and said "Ronald! We're finished!" before she stormed off towards the common room.

"Ron that was a bit… Weird…" Harry said, looking at the way he was still hugging Draco.

"Whatever, I do what I want," Ron replied, dragging Draco with him towards the castle grounds.

Fred suddenly burst out laughing and said "Remember when Ron was in love with that plant pot in the garden just because it was the same colour as his hair? This is a bit like that!" and Harry and George started laughing with him.

The teachers were rather astounded by the way the students were behaving and McGonagall turned to Dumbledore and Snape and said "House points are just like a muggle magic trick. You see them, then you don't!" she laughed as a few of the students continued to fight and she deducted some more house points from both Slytherin and Gryffindor, whilst adding a few points to Gryffindor because of the joke.

"Who wants free house points?" Snape asked, rolling his eyes at the number of points McGonagall was giving the Gryffindors.

Fred and George immediately put their hands up and Snape scowled at them.

"Why don't we settle this fight over a game of Quidditch?" Oliver Wood suddenly suggested.

"Now that is an excellent idea, Wood! 10 more points awarded to Gryffindor for having such clever thinking!" McGonagall said and Snape scowled at McGonagall this time.

"Remember, there's no "I" in Team Gryffindor!" Wood said, smiling proudly at the Gryffindors around the corridor.

"Yes there is!" Snape replied, smirking at the ignorance of the Gryffindor Quidditch Captain. "And anyway Quidditch is cancelled."

Wood looked completely broken up by the idea of there being no Quidditch when Snape added "NOT!" to the end of his sentence and Wood looked unbelievably relieved.

Harry, Fred and George were all in hysterics at the look on Wood's face at finding out he was still allowed to play Quidditch.

Professor McGonagall looked at all of the students and said "Shouldn't you all be in lessons anyway?" The students all nodded and dispersed to their History of Magic lesson half an hour late as usual.

Professor Binns began calling the register to see who was there. He got to Hermione's name and said "Hannah? Hannah Abbott? Miss Abbott?"

"Sir she's not here today…" Harry said and the whole class laughed.

"Very well..." and he continued to call the rest of the register.

As professor Binns finished the register, Draco started to hum a tune which soon turned into singing, "I'm not in love… It's just a phase that I'm going through…"

Ron glared at Draco and said "I take it what we did earlier didn't mean anything to you then?"

Draco smirked and shook his head. Harry looked at Ron sympathetically and noticed that Professor Binns was so wrapped up in teaching the lesson that he wouldn't notice if a few students left so he said "To the secret lair!" and indicated the door.

"You mean the Whomping Willow?" Ron replied, smiling.

"Where else would I mean?" Harry asked and Ron just smiled and followed Harry out of the classroom.

As they left the classroom, Harry heard Professor Binns saying, "Now today's lesson is about The History of… How do you pronounce it?"

"Hog-warts?" Hermione replied and Harry and Ron left the classroom laughing at the ignorance of their history of magic teacher.

When Harry and Ron arrived at the Whomping Willow, Harry said "You first Ron."

"Why me?" Ron replied, looking rather annoyed.

"Because I went first last time!" Harry replied.

"You know we could just go and sit in the common room?" Ron asked, hopefully.

"Ok then if you want to," Harry replied and they headed off to the common room instead.

As they entered the common room they saw Fred was working on a homework assignment, something almost entirely unheard of for him.

"Why are you doing homework, Fred?" Ron asked, looking at the work curiously and wondering what had made Fred be in such a strange mood to actually want to do his homework.

"Angelina Johnson said she'd go out with me if I could actually get a good mark for once," Fred replied, laughing, "Hmmm… When in a fight, what is the first thing you should do?"

"I would probably knock Malfoy out for a start!" Ron said, laughing.

Hermione looked up from her book and said "You'd knock your boyfriend out? I highly doubt that Ronald!" then returned to reading.

Fred laughed and said "We have to ask ourselves, what would Voldemort do?" The whole common room started laughing hysterically at Fred's question.

"I can't wait to wipe the smirk off his face," Harry said, laughing at the thought of Voldemort's fighting technique failing when suddenly the Dark Lord appeared in the common room.

He looked at Fred and asked "What would I do when, Weasley?"

"What would you do in a fight?" Fred replied, wondering why the Dark lord had even bothered to turn up in their common room.

"Kill the opponent…" Voldemort replied, picking Harry up, "And they would die with something such as a sword…" he smirked at the idea of Harry dying with a sword through his heart, "You got to stick it to the man."

"Kids, don't try this at home," Harry said before he kicked Voldemort in the privates and he fell to the ground in pain.

"Was that necessary?" Voldemort asked, wincing in pain.

"Yes it was. It shows Fred what happens to people that try to kill their opponents," Harry replied, laughing.

"Well that's just typical!" Voldemort said, wincing again.

"If irony was pumpkins, we would be drinking a lot of pumpkin juice right now," Hermione said, drinking a glass of pumpkin juice.

"That reminds me of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang when the car was flying and the muggles were so amazed by it!" Fred said, laughing.

"How does this remind you of a muggle musical, Fred?" Hermione asked, sounding quite intrigued.

"Well the muggles were amazed so easily and Voldemort was defeated so easily. It sort of goes really," he laughed.

Suddenly the door flew open and Snape and McGonagall were standing in the doorway. Snape ran to Voldemort's side and took out a potion. "What is it?" Voldemort asked, looking reluctant to take it.

"Why, its Snape's greatest potion of all!" Hermione replied, getting up out of her chair "Isn't that right Harry?" she said, completely ignoring Ron altogether.

"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn," said Harry, smirking at the pain Voldemort was in on the carpet, "All I can say is he deserves the pain!"

"Bloody stupid girls," Ron muttered at being ignored. Fred laughed at him.

"How often do you think about putting my Lord in pain like this?" Snape asked, looking at Voldemort with real concern.

"All day, every day," Harry replied, laughing at the look on Snape's face.

"How dare you!" Snape said, getting up and pinning Harry against the wall, "How dare you insult my master's power!"

The whole room went silent and Snape pointed his wand at Harry. McGonagall said "Severus, put your wand down or you wont have a job here any more."

"Booyah!" shouted Hermione at the thought of Snape no longer working at the school.

Snape turned on Hermione and said "You really don't want me to work here?"

"I don't think anyone does!" she replied and he ran from the room crying.

At some point, peeves and Dobby had arrived and Peeves shouted at Dobby "Go get 'em cowboy!" and Dobby immediately ran after Snape, shouting "Come back! I want you here!"

Peeves flew around the room cackling "Voldie's gone Mouldy! Voldie's gone Mouldy!" and Voldemort threw a book at Peeves. "Now that wasn't very nice Mouldy!" Peeves shouted, cackling and disappearing through the wall after Dobby.

McGonagall looked around at the students and said "Fred is doing homework?" sounding highly surprised.

"He is. I'm so confused," Harry replied, laying down on the sofa.

"You're not the only one," McGonagall replied, leaving the room to find some sort of councillor.


End file.
